Hi everyone, I wanted to share some of my experiences with hopes that you would find comfort in knowing that it isn’t impossible to find that person for you.
I struggled with dating for a very long time. I was not looking for the right thing and trying to create this vision in my head of the perfect person which caused me to ignore red flags or create interest that didn’t actually exist. I gave multiple people my heart way too soon and was always crushed in the end. I’ve learned so much through the years and tried to teach myself to be a perfect partner but in all reality it’s about finding someone who wants who you really are.
My struggles with insecurity prevented me from being happy with myself and in turn, made partners not happy with me. One day I finally said screw it, I’m done dating and I gave up, or at least I thought I did.
I was back and forth on dating apps for years, like every single one. Went on a lot of dates and realized I hated dates. It sucks having to put in all this effort for nothing to happen or to get hurt.
One night, I redownloaded Tinder and put as my caption “give me your best Reddit pickup line” because I was fishing for something to post on the sub. Super lame and tacky, I know. I received a lot of funny stuff and it was pretty entertaining. At this moment, I wasn’t looking to talk to anyone or meet anyone. I received a few heys or hi’s and I didn’t have intention of sparking a conversation, but I decided to respond to this one guy.
He was attractive, had real photos that weren’t all flashy and just seemed like a nice person, but of course that’s really all based on their profile. We messaged for about a week and I went on a date with him.
Tinder dates are always so awkward in the beginning and I’ve learned to really not have any expectations at this point. He was pretty quiet so I thought he hated me and I felt so bad that I agreed to this date. Come to find after, he did like me and he was just really shy. I didn’t feel that initial spark that I feel like you’re always meant to feel, but we continued going on dates and I really started to like the guy.
We are about to celebrate our one year next week. I still can’t believe to this day that it is real and it’s happening.
The point of this is to never give up or sell yourself short. There truly are people out there who feel the same way as you and want to give the same love to you that you want to give them. People always told me it happens when you least expect it, and they were right. Any time I was too eager to jump into something, it bit me in the ass. But taking the time to get to know someone and slowly learning each other can blossom into something you didn’t know existed.
Never give up! There is always something there for you, maybe even multiple people in your lifetime. It’s about finding someone in places you wouldn’t expect it to, taking it slow and feeling a balance between your feelings.
If you’ve read this far, thank you for reading!
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