Typical. I am a late twenties years old guy. I describe myself as a confident person, a kind one too (as said many years ago by a girl that fell in love with me). Yes, I have your typical confidence problems that anyone has. But most importantly, I am quite ambitious compared to my peers. Most of my peers are not your average Joe: they are quite good at what they do (hint: I am a graduate student at a top 5 university).
Some description: I am very athletic, I am quite good at what I do, I have drive in my life. The only thing that I would say it is 'bad': my face haha I have some acne, and depending on the angle from which you look I am not the most attractive guy in the room (so this gives me some confidence issues on my bad days). Nevertheless, a few years back, before starting my graduate studies I dated very beautiful girls (do not ask me how, they did most of the work. They usually seem the only ones attracted to me. My theory is that they are the type of people more focused on what it is inside of a person).
Since I've started my graduate studies, I've NOT been dating. I live in a city where it is VERY difficult to socialise, and let's not talk about dating. It seems to me that unless you have girls in your group of friends, department, residence, it is very difficult to date. Oh, yes, if you are tall or handsome those rules do not apply. Girls shells break quite quickly.
In normal times, I would just hang out with my friends when I am socialising. Now, as you know, life is very difficult, and Zoom becomes less engaging with time. I think I have lots of frustration now.
I made Tinde, Bumble, Hinge... Got ignored. My pictures are very simple ones, and I do not show abs, cool moves, etc... as I wanted to attract a certain type of girls. But nothing. After I noticed I had less focus on my work, I cancelled them, as I was not efficient as I should be.
I went even out with the hope to approach some girl on the streets or the supermarket, nothing, no girls out there. I think they smell the disperation from miles haha
Now. I talked to some of my friends (who are now all in relationships), and they told me to chill and relax. How can I? I really do not know how to do this. I do not know WHAT to do. There is no WAY to socialise in person in these days.
Please: DO NOT TELL ME FOCUS ON YOURSELF. All these years, since my teens I really worked hard on myself, mentally and physically. And I tried to do the best I can do at school. Despite this, I can not have romantic adventures. Seems so easy for everyone. Seems easy for guys that do not do anything. Easy for guys that just because of a few good pictures can date. Guys that probably still have a lot to do. I see all these people that did not work on themselves, as I did, and can enjoy the good things in life. Yes, I know, some of them would like to be in my position. And at the same time, I envy them a bit for how easy things are for them. But I also admire the fact that they are cool with themselves.
So, it brings me to the conclusion: there is something wrong with me. If despite working on myself I did not attract anybody in the last few years. I do not know what happened to me. Maybe I just became less confident? Maybe it is just that there are too many tall and handsome guys with normal personalities. Or maybe it is just that because in this city is so difficult to socialise I simply do not meet girls, and so it is not about me. It could be that I became very negative since I came here.
But what makes me so angry, is that normal regular dudes are dating, with nothing special. I can not believe that I am just ignored.
End of the rant, and the disordered writing, but I really had to put out my thoughts.
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