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Saturday, October 19, 2024

Looking for opinions (20F and 23M)

Long story, but I’m confused. There’s this guy who’s in my friend group. For context, I’m on my schools women’s basketball team, and he was on the men’s team last year (he graduated).

Before summer this year, I told him that I thought he was cool and wanted to get to know him more, but he has a girlfriend. During that conversation though, he told me he would still be around to help our team (he’s now one of our volunteer assistants) even though he was graduating, he told me he vibed with me, and “doesn’t know” about his girlfriend (I think they were going through something). I was okay with that since I did already know he had a girlfriend, and I just needed to get it off my chest. This year rolls around, and like he said, he is around a lot. All of a sudden, we started texting through Snapchat and have been in consistent conversation for about 2 weeks. Granted, I am pretty busy most of the time and lowkey am a bad texter, but 2 weeks feels like awhile, especially since he has a girlfriend. We’ve gotten into some pretty deep stuff too.

I don’t want to be disrespectful to his girlfriend because I would never want that kind of thing to happen to me, but it’s difficult because I have strong feelings for him and he previously said that he “doesn’t know” about her. I want to hang out with him because I feel like I’m more fun in person than on text, so I asked one of our mutual friends if we could do a group thing (which is probably a bad idea).

Should I ask him what’s up with his girlfriend? I feel as though he could be messing with me because he knows how I feel about him, but there’s also been multiple occasions where it would’ve been fine for him to leave me on read or end the conversation and he hasn’t.

Also, I’ve never been in a relationship and he is more experienced. I’m trying to be smart about this whole situation, but having feelings is hard. What should I do?

submitted by /u/Latter_Sprinkles_673
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