Was she just using me for attention? - ATX News Paper

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Friday, November 24, 2023

Was she just using me for attention?

Brief context: We have only been on one date, she live two hours away and has been ducking attempts by me to go on another date because she’s super busy for the month before I had to go back to school. She said she wanted to hang again during winter break after I confessed that I wanted to see her and complemented her a lot after she ghosted me for a week. In the following months she would update her hinge pictures and location before texting me back or responding to me after days sometimes up to 4. Most weeks I send her pictures of what I’m working on my thesis cus she said she lives for the updates. She responds to the the text usually the next day and then the conversation stops there until I send something again.

A specific branch of situations happened that resulted in me getting blocked here is the context: She left me on delivered for 4 days after I asked her a question then she brought up how excited she was that she’s going to London disregarding what I wrote. We had a brief conversation maybe a text a day after that, then I asked her what she did at the gym and don’t tell me you do leg day everyday, (obviously as a joke) and send her a funny image about what kinda fit she should get while in London (for vacation). She leaves me on delivered for a while again like 3-4 days, during that time she’s updating her hinge location and changing pictures, and doesn’t respond till I say I hope she didn’t find my joke rude she says that she found it funny using emojis and stuff but she hasn’t been responding to anyone and that she’s going through a lot family wise and that it’s been a bad week.

She then says like a week later on Tuesday, after I double text her after a couple days saying, she deserves to have a wonderful week, that she wants to ft soon. I tell her I’m down and we plan for Saturday. I send her a picture of my thesis like usual on Friday and she doesn’t respond I also say in the same message that I’m looking forward to seeing you tomorrow. On Saturday I call her and she doesn’t answer she says she’s sorry she was working a festival with her friend and we could call tomorrow morning. I tell her Sunday morning that I’ll call her at 10. I call her and she doesn’t pick up. I ask if she’s busy and she doesn’t respond. I wait an hour at which point I’m really hurt I tell her that it was kind of fucked for her to treat me like this, she wanted to ft first and I didn’t see what she was gaining by treating me this way. Also that I was hurt.

After reflecting the whole day I send her another text basically apologizing saying I wasn’t trying to be mean and just wanting her to be upfront with me and communicate and thought she felt the same way about me.

She finally responds saying that it’s valid for me to be upset but I didn’t have to come at her like that and that she was and still is going through a lot family wise and she’s tired from working 24 hours in two days. And that she found out last minute about working. The next morning I fully apologize and say I hope she forgives me and we can work on our communication together and that I don’t want to lose talking to her.

She then blocks me on hinge first and then my number/everything when I go to text her later on in the day.

Ik I shouldn’t have done what I did but for me I think it was a culmination of feeling like she was just using me for attention and I was putting in too much effort and not seeing it reciprocated. The reason I question if she was just using me for attention is because she’d only respond if I complemented her or if I double texted her in a way in which a non response would make her feel bad ( like the gym comment). Honestly I shouldn’t have gotten so attached and will not in the future

I’m interested to hear an outsiders opinion thanks.

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