I (28M) is in the early stages of developing a relationship with (30F). The topic of timelines for children has been hard to compromise. - ATX News Paper

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Monday, February 15, 2021

I (28M) is in the early stages of developing a relationship with (30F). The topic of timelines for children has been hard to compromise.

So I have recently started seeing this girl who very recently turned 30. Everything has been going great so far. To be quite honest I have never felt so comfortable being around someone and through my dating life I haven’t really had that strong of a connection with someone. I understand that it’s early on but we are both on the same page as she has expressed many similar feelings. However there is a lingering problem that I’m not sure can be compromised on and that’s when we want children.

She’s adamant on having two kids and wants to start having kids in 1-2 years. I told her that I’m not entirely certain about a timeline but estimated around 3-4 years because I’m currently waiting on grad school applications. If I’m accepted, then it definitely leans more on the 4 years, however, the alternate route (which I planned before getting into the relationship) was finding a job with the current degree and focusing on schooling further down the road which makes it more feasible to meet her deadline.

Also it is important to note that she called it off after a few dates because of this issue. She told me that she was seeing a guy who wanted to have kids soon however she could not stop thinking about me and that it’s best to focus on the person that’s better suited for you or that you have more of a connection with. So right now we are trying our best to make it work.

I’m at a crossroads.. Either keep going forward with this person and see if our relationship grows with the potential risk of it not working out in the end or cut ties and move on. The latter being something that I really really don’t want to do.

submitted by /u/Chandlerbling1
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