I (26F) went on a date with this guy (28M) and feeling very confused about it all. We met on hinge and live in the same neighborhood in NYC so he immediately asked me out on a date for Saturday. We had a 2 hour phone call before the date on Wednesday night and he briefly mentioned that he didn’t realize I was south asian (he’s chinese). He said based on my skin tone he thought I was white.
I immediately paused and clarified with him that I’m south asian and tan and if he’s okay with that. He said I’m still asian so it’s similar at least to east asians. I honestly was hesitant abt the date since then but we continued to have a really long conversation and he still seemed eager to go on the date.
Day of the date we meet up and get some tea and head towards a gallery. When I first showed up he immediately commented that he could see now how I look south asian. (Honestly I probably should’ve left here). Convo was good we both talked, didn’t really feel like I was carrying the conversation. After the gallery we walked around the park. And we were supposed to go to a brunch spot after but idk he wasn’t really bringing it up we kept walking around the park🤷🏻♀️ Eventually he says one of his friends is in the city and really wants to see me and him. And I thought he was joking at first but before I know it we’re going to meet his friend. The friend was a few years older 36F and she had lunch set out for us. I felt so embarrassed and bad that I was on a date and she’s buying us food?
Anyways he introduces me and here and there he keeps talking as if we will meet again in the future. (ex. talking about next time we should all meet and hang out with his friends, and that I should text him at work whenever I have wifi, etc…) After lunch he tells me he forgot to mention he needs to help a friend build her bed. I didn’t want to go but both the girl and him convince me to just go and hang out. We walk to her apt and she’s apologizing profusely when she sees me and says she didn’t know he was on a date and that he’s a great guy. They eventually go downstairs to buy some tools and I’m just awkwardly in the apt with the other female friend. Eventually I text him that I have to go and he texts back that he’s on his way and he bought me a drink. It felt rude to disappear so I said I would wait to say bye in person. I say bye to him and leave to go home. No follow up texts from him last night or today.
I feel so conflicted on why he had me meet so many of his friends? Either he was really not feeling the date and just wanted to escape or he felt comfortable introducing me to his friends so they can vibe check me? Either way he didn’t give me any clear indication that he’s interested other than just mentioning I should text him and that we should hang out again with his friends. I also feel like maybe he’s just not into me as a south asian women and it feels hurtful to be rejected like that. I haven’t texted him first because I would rather he just reject me over text if he’s not feeling it. But idk how to interpret this, I’m just confused.
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