Hi! So I want to start by saying I don't want this to be a mean conversation. I want us all to go in with creativity and brainstorming simply because I'm still trying to figure out my own brain and that's no one's responsibility. I'm just shooting ideas out to see if anyone has had similar experiences and had any lived in advice.
So I'm a 28F and have lived a life travelling the world serving in missions. I suffered a physical assault not rape, just invasion of hands in places they shouldn't be) When I was 12 and did not take the time to heal from it until I was 22 and started going to counseling. I now have a healthy relationship with many friends and family members, work in my community, have a healthy relationship with my faith (also have had counseling for thos with the Christian purity culture). I have begun taking care of my health (lost 50 lbs) and have hobbies I enjoy. I can pay for and support myself without being an independent boss woman. I cook and clean and do domestic hobbies like quilting and veggie gardening while enjoying other types of hobbies like axe throwing and road trips cross country alone. I’ve traveled the word (unglamourously - never been to a resort, just seeing what I can do while saving the most money). I have some college schooling and had decent grades but it didn't consume me.
I state all this just to give some prerequisites that I may not have to answer later.
I am a virgin (never seen a pens in a sexual setting, clinical or changing diapers of kids but never in an intimate relationship with someone). I haven't even really dated anyone mainly because I haven't been asked much though I may have been unintentionally making myself unavailable because I was healing and didn't want to drag anyone into my mess while I was making myself a kinder, healthier person. Plus I never lived in one house longer than 2-6 years growing up due to my parents work.
I have since settled some in terms of where I live and have seen my friends all grow up and get married or are engaged. Ive noticed only about 3 times in my life did I find myself physically attracted to someone. Despite being extremely horny a LOT of the time. If you exclude the fact that my faith states I am not allowed to engage sexually with someone until I'm married; I consider myself someone who knows that *because* I am hyper sexual, its honestly been safer for me to not pursue someone I'm sexually attracted to because I know all of my mental fortitude would crumble the second I had an opportunity of their consent to engage sexually.
Sorry, I'm probably giving WAY more context than I need. My question is, is it possible to hypersexual while also not being attracted to hardly anyone? It's like, I would love to be friends with lots of people, I have many long standing healthy relationships with men both married and not married, but have only considered sex with like 2-3 (unmarried men, not married men) over 28 years. And when I did, I was ready with hardly knowing anything about them. Like I was still some young teen. Is it normal? Am I self-sabotaging? Is there something else I hadn't considered?
I am open to constructive criticism and brainstorming. I am not desperately looking for an immediate solution. Im just opening the conversation for people to genuinely toss ideas around. Please be kind to each other!
[link] [comments]
from Dating Advice https://ift.tt/Kuc5SaI
via IFTTT
No comments:
Post a Comment