So I am a woman and 25 years, I am living at home with my family, I've never been in a relationship. I have online apps where I have some matches with men (it's too difficult to get matches with women). I have been on one date so far but he didn't want to go on another date, I think maybe because I live at home with my family, because I have poor mental health, I said something wrong, or maybe it could have been anything like my appearance. I would really like to get a house and lots of finance before finding a partner but at 25 I feel so depressed being alone and getting older as I age less people will find me attractive. But with my mental health problems I feel like I am just a bad partner for anyone and I'm not even myself, anyone but me would be better, but I still feel the pressure to try. All my friends have loving partners and it makes me feel bad because I never had that.
But when I go on dates and things I am thinking that the men will want to have sex soon and I feel really uncomfortable about that because I don't know how to have sex and I have no private house to have sex in, having my family know I am having sex feels really shameful and I wouldn't want to talk to them about that because they are already against things like oral contraceptives. No man would wait a year or so (unless he was asexual) until I save up a deposit for a house to be comfortable enough to have sex would he? Or if I am uncomfortable with it wouldn't he want a different girl who already has experience and desire? And I just feel like I am worthless mostly to be honest, why would anyone want to be with me when I have such mental problems I can't really feel much emotions, and I've got an odd appearance, and I'm getting older, I don't have a good personality?
Yeah, I don't know if you guys have any advice? Should I save up for a house then look for a partner afterwards? By that time I will be 26 at the earliest but I could be 27,28,29... I feel like I don't have any time left really until I am in my 40s and then I would have never created a bond with any partner when I was still a younger adult which really crushes me.
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