Right before quarantine happened (March), I, (25M) went out on a date with a girl (20F). We met on tinder, and she showed interest almost immediately. We made plans to meet later that week, which she sort of initiated. Fast forward to the date, I was meeting her after work and she agreed to meet me near my job. She came on time and as soon as she saw a glimpse of me she came fast towards me and gave me a big hug. I took her to this little place that made good veggie burgers and we talked about everything from our respective career paths to the type of music we enjoy. The date lasted maybe an hour or two but it was certainly memorable. She was undoubtedly the hottest girl I’ve ever been out with, and she was flirty, which put me at ease.
When the date ended, she explained she had to go help her roommate pack due to the people leaving, anticipating the first wave of covid to hit NYC. Before she left, she kissed me very passionately and told me we would see each other again, she also texted that night expressing that she had “lots of fun.”
A couple days later, she told me she wanted to see me again but we both couldn’t pin point what we had wanted to do. I suggested something lowkey, such as a walk in the park, but she wanted to watch a movie instead. Since covid was just becoming reality, the movie theaters were virtually empty and were only at 50% capacity. I said sure, but then she quickly backtracked and said, “never mind. it seems pretty risky right now, i’ll let you know if i’m free next week.”
Essentially, I took this as a turndown but I still remained optimistic and she still texted me a little more that day. After a couple days of no texting, I hit her up to see how she was doing, no response...
Months had passed, it was already September. I have gone on a few dates. Nothing really stuck. She didn't have an instagram, but she had a twitter (journalism major). I came across her on my suggested page one night. After a back and forth with one of my friends, I decided to dm her, even after 5 months had already came and gone.
I sent her a well-versed paragraph, basically stating that due to the rise of the pandemic, that night with her was probably the best of 2020, and I wanted to know why she had ghosted. I sent it to her reluctantly, thinking that she might not even see it, but boy, was I wrong.
She responded the very next morning. While she didn't have to, she told me about her personal problems that she was dealing with, things that I totally understand. She was nice in her response. Didn't seem to care about the sudden message. She had given me the closure I needed to fully move on from that night. I thought I would never speak to her again.
I was wrong.
She hit me up at 1am the other day (November 12th) and said, "hey baby, what's your number? I just want to see what's up."
Now, when I saw this message, my heart raced 1000x per minute. I could hardly move. I was stunned. I contemplated not even responding, but I ultimately gave in. I gave her my number and asked if everything was alright, due to it being an odd hour and us not talking for a while. She expressed that she couldn't stop thinking about me after I had sent her the dm prior and that she'd been holding off the feelings for awhile. She asked if I was back in New York. I said I never left. She offered me to come over that night, but it being almost 2am. I had to refuse. She understood and we texted how much we missed each other.
The next work day, she said her class got cancelled and that she wanted to see me. Me, with it being a decent hour, agreed. I went all the way across the 5 boroughs to see her.
When I got there, she acted very chill, almost like we've seen each other every day since we last met. She offered me a drink, and told me to sit down on the couch while she finished her work. The apartment was for three roommates, they were all gone, it was only her. I waited about 20 minutes for her.
Then finally, she came out of her room. With blush on her face and a sexy outfit. She apologized for the wait but quickly jumped on top of me... that's all I will say about that.
Our encounter lasted the entire night and I ended up sleeping over. It was one of the better days of recent memory. She seemed SO into me, cuddling with me after sex, kissing me, and complimenting me. During the encounter I had actually told her about how happy I had felt after our first date, and how down I felt when she ghosted me. She started to cry, she told me her whole story and I understood where she was coming from.
I had to leave in the morning because I had to get home to my work computer. I didn't want to leave. I just spent the night with someone I had thought I'd never see again. I probably should have called-in sick, but it wouldn't have made sense given my job was still working from home. I kissed her goodbye and she knew I was crazy about her.
Now a couple days later, she said she wanted to see a movie with me. I was set to come over with my macbook, on the off chance I was going to work from her place the next day. I was ready for it. When I texted asking for a confirmation today, she said she realized that she was so busy but still wanted me to come over. We just can't watch a movie and that she will be working (she was working a little bit during our first sexual encounter). I told her it was no problem, and that seeing her was enough and the movie was just a bonus. She initially agreed and changed the time for me to come over for later in the day. 30 minutes later, she sent a text cancelling the rendezvous. Stating, she will "hit me up some other time." I told her there was no need apologize and that we can make it work for when she's free, and to have a good night.
I am curious about how concerned I should be that she will ghost me again? Should I be worried, or maybe just give her some time/space? Let me know what you guys think.
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