Hi. I’m 28F & the man I’ve been seeing for almost 2 months is 29M. This is my best friends childhood friend and things have honestly been great so far. For someone who works 60 or more hours a week, he always sees me at least once on the weekends, we booked a long weekend getaway for January, and texts me regularly throughout the day. Texting has been sliding, I noticed. Which I figured would happen. We all try to keep up good impressions when we first meet someone we are interested in and texting would start drift while we’re at work. Yesterday was probably the first day it really wasn’t much but he had a holiday party at work so okay I get it. He texted me at 1am and of course I was asleep so I answered it this morning and we exchanged maybe 3 texts. It’s been silent since then. But I can see on socia media he is out with one of his friends who’s a girl. I really do not care that he’s out with a friend that’s a girl. He could be with guys and I would still feel this way. Plus I know he’s keeping her company because it’s like his best friend and she lost her dad recently and he lost his dad so he’s being a good friend which again I have no issue with. My issue is that okay he never responded from my 10AM text which was a question so at 4pm I texted again and said we should get dinner Saturday and still nothing. Obviously he’s on his phone if he’s posting on social media, why can’t he just fucking say I’m busy, but I’ll call you later? I don’t feel like that communication is asking for too much. Like I feel like that’s just normal consideration to someone you talk to every day that if you’re AWOL, you say that. But maybe I’m wrong. So yea that small thing he can’t do is really getting under my skin. BUT I am mostly upset with myself. I know this anxiety/insecurity stems from my ex I was with for 8 years and how he treated me and how he would purposely ignore me for a day or two to prove a point or stonewall me and I’m upset that it still has me being like this. So I was wondering if anyone has any advice on how to deal? Like how do you not look at your phone and want to throw it up against the wall with no message? And yes I put my phone down for hours today and did other things with my family, but I was getting more irritable looking with nothing then having it in my hands. And I just want to say I really don’t think he’s done anything wrong because I mean he didn’t. I feel like this is a me issue that I need to fix and idk how. So yea advice on coping and dealing or different exercises would be very appreciative! Thank you in advance. I don’t want to talk to him about it because even though we’re exclusively dating, we don’t call ourselves bf and gf nor have either of us met each other’s families so I don’t think 1. It’s fair to discuss or 2. Appropriate to discuss it with him currently
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