First I'd like to apologize for the length of this post, but can really use some insight
I've been seeing this girl (not exclusively) for roughly about a month now. We've been on two dates, which were both awesome. The first date resulted in me staying over at her place for the night and getting brunch together the next day (no sex, which is fine with me). The second date we grabbed drinks and went back to her place. Made to to third-base this time. She's wanting to take things slow and I want to respect that (so still no sex). I initiated the invitation for both occasions, which is expected since I am the guy... no problem.
When we're around eachother it just flows. It feels natural and there are no awkward moments. The problem is the time between dates. We both have demanding and busy jobs throughout the day so we don't text eachother much if ever. That's fine and dandy. In the evening, there's more downtime and I often find that we only exchange 1-3 text messages that really go nowhere. I'm in full understanding that some people simply may not like to text and by no means to I want a deep and philosophical conversation. A simple "how was you day?" would suffice tbh.
Being out of town for about 2 weeks due to work, I gave her a call on Monday to chat. The conversation went quite well. As for the days following, there wasn't really much going on between us other than a random text here and there. Actually slower back and forths than usual, and even that was already spare. I had a phone call with her today and it was "Okay." I was asking her how her week has been and asked what she had planned for the weekend. I mentioned to her that I'd actually be back in town next Friday and she said that was "exciting". I was hoping she would've said something like "hey we should do something". Nothing.
I went ahead and dropped in that we should get together and do something and she said didn't know what she had planned but is overall down. I just felt this weird vibe so I simply just told her to let me know since I didn't want to pressure her. That was the end of that.
The call was drying up, so I simply said I'd let her go and wished her a good night.
With all of that said I DO like this girl. She's very smart and very down to earth. The pain point is I'm not feeling the "drive" from her. I don't know if it's all just a mental thing and I'm just in my own head, but it's coming off as disinterst. But when we're on a date, its a different story. So it's somewhat draining me mentally and emotionally and I thinking of backing off a little. By that I mean not text as much, possibly text her every other day. Not call. Then regarding the invite for the date, I left the ball in her court to let me know. I think that if she's truly intersted she will get back to me mid/next week. If I hear nothing I'm basically done. Thoughts? I'm not going to drop her, but I really do need to see "effot" lack for a better term. I hope I don't sound selfish saying that.
I'd love to hear everyone's feedback and advise on this.
tl:dr: I like this girl and we click so well in person. But the time between dates is a different story. I dont feel purseud as much as I'm pursing her. Would backing off screw me over?
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